The Arctic Elvis (Called so only because I live in the Arctic, not because the ingredients are in any way Arctic in origin)

• 2 slices whole wheat bread (that’s how my Grandmother made it, so that’s how you’re going to make it)
• 1/2 banana, sliced lengthwise into 1/4 inch thick slices
• 1 tablespoon chunky peanut butter
• 1 tablespoon mayonnaise

Instructions: Put the peanut butter on one side and the mayo on the other, bananas in the middle. Put a good chunk of butter in a frying pan and fry the sandwich like you would a grilled cheese.  This is great for breakfast, but I don’t recommend combining it with Valium and Demoral, because that will apparently kill you.

I know what you’re thinking. The mayo is the difficult part. But if you don’t include it, you haven’t made an Elvis, you’ve made toast with bananas and peanut butter.  Don’t be a sissy. Put the mayo on.